Dialogues of Nodin and William

Virtuous Wife #19

(PD) Edward S. Curtis - Maricopa

Larry Neal Gowdy

Though man might travel the stars,

and man might glory in his own life,

still the man knows his greatest values,

are within the love of a virtuous wife.

Adalii: We are both women, and you understand, do you not? My heart's pain is the hunger for properness, to possess and to become a thing of quality; to become a... I am unsure what, but to improve, to be better than I am now.

Adanata: Your husband, William, his is the male way, ours is the female. The male, he does not understand our way, because he has not experienced life as a female. How could he know?

Adalii: I have been told by the many different priests and philosophers that I should submit to their beliefs and their ways, that I would find my purpose and properness if I were to act and live as the priests and philosophers want me to act and live. Is their way the right way? How can I know which way is right if all of their ways disagree with the other?

Adanata: Your path is yours, not the priests', nor the philosophers'. Finding our path, it is us that is finding, it is not someone else choosing. We cannot find our path if we are not ourselves using our own eyes to see.

Adalii: True, it seems to not be beneficial for the heart if I were to merely obey what someone else tells me to do.

Adanata: Many traditions are honorable, but only if we choose the life ourselves, and there is no honor nor value in putting on a face that is not the mirror of the heart.

Adalii: It is difficult, in a world formed upon the male way, for a woman to find her path.

Adanata: Nature has formed the male to walk forward, as Nature has formed the female to walk backwards, and we cannot overcome what Nature has chosen, but when the male and female walk together, theirs is the fulfillment of Nature, and Nature is wise.

Adalii: This is what I continue to see, that if there were mutual ground, perhaps surely then I would begin to find my own fulfillment.

Adanata: What, in your estimation, is the greatest beauty?

Adalii: Love; love for husband, family, all things.

Adanata: Then now I do not understand, that if you are of the knowing that love is your beauty, then have you not already found your path?

Adalii: Though I may love, still I am hesitant, afraid to love, for the many ideologies claim that I should keep myself separate, and to not experience personal contact with the things that I love.

Adanata: Oh Adalii, please, listen to your own heart. What has William said of this?

Adalii: I have not yet spoken to William about my fears, for I am afraid that my uncertainties might cause him a distress.

Adanata: Have you not felt William's heart growing stronger?

Adalii: Yes, he is becoming a man, an honorable man, one that I adore, and one that I so long to be within the presence, but the more than he grows, the more that I am concerned of my not being worthy of his presence.

Adanata: When you hold hands, do you not feel his radiance?

Adalii: Yes, and I dwell within that radiance.

Adanata: Then you had become male?

Adalii: Yes, that is a thing that I had not before pondered, but yes, in a manner of speaking, I walk forward into his radiance.

Adanata: And when your hearts touch near, where are you?

Adalii: Again, I dwell within his heart's radiance.

Adanata: Know this, that he who loves, he has surrendered, walking backwards, he has become female. William walks backwards when in your presence, and in so doing he becomes neither male nor female, because you are both present in love, and he is then whole.

Adalii: This, is Nature's way, is it not? The polarities, forwards and backwards, push and pull, within all things, living and inanimate.

Adanata: Yes, and the fulfillment of the cycle that is creative, it flows in all directions, simultaneously. But it does require participation, by both the male and the female, that both possess and express the love for the other. This is Nature, Nature's way, and it must be Nature's way, of that of male and female; there is no other option.

Adalii: That has been my failing, for my not reciprocating love. I was with a cautiousness to not commit a wrong behavior, because I had been told by the priests and philosophers that I should not become close to that which I love, and now I believe that my caution and trust in the priests and philosophers was itself the cause of wrong behavior.

Adanata: Man's world is formed upon beliefs that physical acts are the fulfilling of correct behavior, but the beliefs are wrong, and destructive of the heart and mind. It is not the outward act that creates the inward, but rather the inward is what chooses the outward.

Adalii: Yes, I agree with that, and my troubles have been within the attempting to reconcile man's teachings with what my heart and soul already know to be true.

Adanata: Follow your own self, find your own path, allow your heart to become you, and to not become what someone else wishes you to be.

Adalii: How will I know... is there, a sign, or event, that will illustrate to me that my chosen path is correct?

Adanata: All paths are different, as are all signs different, but for you, and your husband William, when your hearts are pressed together in love, when there is no other activity beyond that of loving within the loving hug, when you feel his heart's radiance describing his soul's love for you, it will then be that you will have discovered, that you are already walking your path. When Nature's cycle of creativity has flowed full circle, and you have experienced it firsthand, at that moment, there is nothing greater anywhere in the universe.

Adalii: William can now better perceive hearts, and he will now better perceive mine, will he not?

Adanata: Yes. If your heart wishes to communicate its love, then let the heart speak, and not the tongue. He will hear, and he will understand. As a man holds his most treasured possession carefully and tenderly in his hands, so likewise allow your heart to hold your husband, and let him know that your love is true.

Adalii: I am not yet of a knowledge of man, but of what I have sensed, it has appeared to me that the male spirit is rather, well, not as full as the female. Will a husband recognize the wife's heart if the husband does not recognize his own?

Adanata: The female spirit flows with many beauties, while the male may have few, but if a man has become a man, an honorable man, then his soul too will hold beauties, and he will recognize his wife's heart, because the two have become one.

Adalii: And the heartless man, he will never experience the beauty, will he?

Adanata: No. Nature insists that there be both polarities; no man can feel love without first having given love.

Adalii: Please forgive my wandering thoughts, but I am reminded of a man, of over a hundred years ago, who claimed that our people's embrace of love, of two hearts pressed together in love, in his eyes our people were savage, and ignorant, somehow inferior to his own people from across the ocean. The world today worships the man's name, they have carved statues of his likeness, and every public school teaches his beliefs as true facts. He did not know, did he? He had no love, and though the man has greatly harmed everyone with his heartlessness, I feel a pity for the man, a sadness that he experienced no love, nor affection, and I marvel that mankind must also be without a love, if mankind can so easily worship a man who does not recognize nor receive affection.

Adanata: A man without love, his is a miserable life, and, unfortunately, as also empty of intelligence.

Adalii: My one goal now, is to hold my husband in my arms, and to do nothing more than to ensure that his heart feels mine, to ensure that his life will not be as empty of value as that of the man of statues.

Adanata: And then observe, how great will be your achievement, your creativity, of having created a thing that betters your husband as well as the world. Your single heart-felt act of affection, and caring, a simple enduring hug, yours is the gift of life, of beauty, a thing that no man can create, nor know, without the wife.

Adalii: But then, if the wife's glory is in her love, then is not the glory equally shared? I could not attain a quality by myself, of my own, without the love of my husband, and so, if the act of loving is creative, then so must the man's love be as important, and necessary.

Adanata: Yes. Love is a miraculous thing, for in love we surrender all, and in the giving of all that we are, we create a thing that returns to us more than we gave. And now that your mind has settled its questions, go, now, and prove it to be true.

Dialogues of Nodin and William - Virtuous Wife #19